No charge - because of love

I have never been charged, and I will never charge. All because of love.

Sometimes, I do hope that my children and my parents get to read my blog because my message for them is "I will always remember to say a prayer for you and for as long as I'm alive, I will say thousands more at no charge because I love you." Insya Allah.

Sometimes, I can be quite sentimental. So this video did it. It made me cry again. And again.

Asking for forgiveness

I was teary-eyed when I watched this the first time, the second time and even the third.



I hope it's easy for me to ask for forgiveness and for my kids to ask for mine... even if it's not Hari Raya.

Strange phenomena.

I stumbled upon an acquaintance's frienster site and I got a rude shock. I'm not sure if I'm thinking and reading too much into it but I guess the family may want to do something about it, to look into helping him or at least talking to him about it.

I'm not sure if it's all a joke.

You see, this person, a male in his early 20s, has his mum always worried about him because he has only male friends. Initially, we thought, maybe his mum was just over reacting. What's wrong with having many male friends when you are a male. I mean, if he has too many female friends too, there's also a cause for concern.

But when my eyes read what he looks for in his friends, in his friendster website, it goes something like - dating men, activity friends.... I mean what's that suppose to mean - a joke?

Some months back, I did have that inkling when I read some of his blog entries but I brushed my strange thoughts aside. How could he ever do stupid things...

I guess I shall not speculate.

But just another thought - While some men (maybe a few in a million) are born with two `you-know-what', I think there are some men, who even though are born perfect as genuine males simply feed and entertain their out-of-nature inclinations. This means, they are born normal and they can be normal. However, whatever sexual inclinations they have thereafer are in fact by choice.

It is complicated - they claim. But I think, complication is something they got themselves into. Because they choose to be in complication. They can, I believe, if they are determined to just be normal and straight. It's a battle. It's a fight. But they just got to be strong.

Yes. Girls do have crushes on girls (having been in a girls school before, you know it happens)and similarly guys have crushes on guys (sounds yuckey but I've heard). But to take another extra step to have a physical relationship...it's something the inner self has to fight. But of course, some things are easier said than done.

May Allah gives us and our families the wisdom to be wise.

Sometimes I wish we can see our Score-card

At times, I do wish I can see how I have been doing as a person, as a mother, as a wife and just as a somebody in this universe. I want to know my scores. I want to know which area I need improvement and which area I am doing well in, in God's perspective.

Well, this is life. We can never know our progress from Him so the nearest we can get to any score-card is for us to do our own self-evaluation. But sometimes, I can be quite tough on myself and sometimes I can be so not-bothered. Also, it's hard to recall and evaluate our true intentions when we did a certain something. God has it all taken care - from intention, right down to the manner things are done and even the effects of what we have done. (By the way, I hate staff ranking exercises at the workplace because they will always fail to see the intention and even the tiny things that miss their eyes so they can never be truly fair)

That's why, sometimes, I want to know so much, how much I've scored and `performed' or how much I have not.

But I guess, that's why we have our brains, our instincts and the Holy scripture - the Quran and Hadis to give us the guidelines as to what makes Him please with us and what does not....and go and live life accordingly.

I got to continue this journey - in a way that He'll be pleased with me. And, oh yes, I love the following. I thought, I must have it somewhere in my blog.

People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered.
Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives.
Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies.
Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you.
Be honest and sincere anyway.

What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight.
Create anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous.
Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, will often be forgotten.
Do good anyway.

Give the best you have, and it will never be enough.
Give your best anyway.

In the final analysis, it is between you and God.
It was never between you and them anyway.