I will make lemonade, insya Allah.

When life gives you lemons, make lemonade or so it says. But if the lemons roll down in an avalanche, how does one cope, I ponder.

It's unhealthy and terrible when the children are reprimanded more than what they deserve because ummi is angry with someone else and with other situations.

Ummi can forget the past but when that someone shares her insecurities (without her knowing they are insecurities) again and again and again and keep on harping on past unhappiness and finding fault with DH and me indirectly, I would be antagonistic, resentful and hurt. I must say that some of her comments can be damaging to the self-esteem.

So how do I deal with those feelings? I think I haven't dealt with them adequately and that is why I become an angry person for about a year now. But I don't want to let the anger survive in me. Actually, I just want to let go.

Forgive - is what I need to do and I will. By forgiving, I am not condoning the nonsense she had said and done but basically I want my hurt to heal and I want to be genuinely happy again.

It may happen again, so what do I do. Would I be strong enough to ignore? Maybe, when she puts down DH, I would either tell her off or maybe just walk away. It will be wonderful to tell her off - to knock some sense into her - but it may appear a little disrespectful.

However, I do vaguely remember a hadeeth which means that if we avoid arguments, a house is built for you in heaven. It's even better if you are truthful yet you avoid arguments....a bigger house is waiting for you in heaven. Very enticing reward.